Return of the Pit Fiend

The elderly halfling pauses for a moment by the smoking remains of the pseudonatural goblin-thing. She pokes at it, licks her finger, and nods before confidently turning to the nervous group. She smiles, perhaps a little too broadly for a normal halfling, and speaks in an old woman's voice. "I can't help but notice that twenty four hours ago, you promised that you'd have Agar Smoketallow back to his home in the Outlands by now." Her foot taps twice. "You know, I think you lied."

"Duh," thinks Tao.

Nolin takes a step forward, attracting the disguised pit fiend's attention. "We just hadn't gotten around to it," he says convincingly. "We were doing other things and got distracted."

Her smile becomes cold and a thread of iron slips into her voice. "No. You lied. You should be very, very careful, you know. Lying is a sin. Every lie is a weight on your soul, and you'd be astonished how little weight is needed to drag a soul down to Hell." She cocks her head as she examines Nolin with piercing, knowing eyes. Her speech is slow and deliberate. "You're clearly no stranger to sin. Lie builds on lie, and before you know it your soul is damned. And it isn't as if you," she chuckles, "have a patron deity to stand up for you in the afterlife. Phoenixes aren't gods." She clucks her tongue. "You ought to be more careful."

Emotions play across Nolin's face, one after another. He winces, frowns, and then bristles in self-righteous anger. "I don't need to take moral advice from a pit fiend!" he snarls.

"No? Really, who would know more about sin than a creature of the Pit? Just ask him about the state of your soul." She gestures expansively at Malachite, and then shifts her attention. "Dear, do you have any more of those lovely rat snacks?" Tao shakes her head mutely. "Then I'm ready to take Master Smoketallow and go. You had a chance, and you lied."

Malachite growls under his breath as his fists clench. "No. Did you bring a copy of the contract?"

"Of course not. I told you before, if you want to see it, go and look at it. Agar's parents have a copy."

"Not good enough. The woman he is supposedly contracted to marry is a fiend. His parents weren't aware of this when they arranged the marriage. False pretenses; that's illegal, and the marriage is off."

The halfling woman's expression is smug, and knowing. "Whether you think it's good enough or not doesn't matter a whit to me. It's all in the contract; go and read it." Her rosy cheeks dimple as she grins. "You might as well take Agar with you when you go. Two birds with one stone."

"I think not. If you want to take him, you'll have to go through us."

The shape changed pit fiend looks the group up and down.

"So?"

"Do we take her?" His tone is outraged.

"We could," considers Stone Bear.

"Yeek!" thinks Agar. "If we have no other choice. I'm thinking that she's really tough." Proty squirms in agreement.

"You know, we need to have some sort of solicitor examine that contract," Malachite thinks over the mindlink.

"I agree," thinks Velendo. "There's got to be a loophole that we can exploit."

"I wonder..." muses Tao silently. "Does he have to be alive? What happens if he's dead at the time that the contract comes due?" Agar stiffens.

"That's right!" agrees Velendo, amused. "We'll just kill him the day before he's due to present himself, and true resurrect him the day after the wedding was supposed to take place! No problem." He chuckles mentally.

"Hey, wait a minute!" protests the halfling alienist. "I don't like that idea one bit!"

"Don't worry," soothes Nolin, "they're just kidding. The fact that your so-called bride isn't a halfling should get you out of the deal. We just don't want to fuss with it until we're done with the White Kingdom."

"If we don't survive this mission, it may be entirely irrelevant." Malachite places one hand on Karthos, who stirs in his sheath. "When is the actual day of presentation when you're due to show up and meet your bride?" As he starts to answer, Agar suddenly feels invisible insects crawling across him, and he squirms in near-panic. He spits out the answer mentally, trying not to give in to his panic.

"At least two months!"

Malachite lifts his gaze to meet that of the disguised pit fiend. "He isn't due at the Presentation Ceremony for two months. Why do you want him back there now?"

The halfling woman looks ingenuous. "You promised me that you'd have him there by now. Frankly, I'd like to see you keep your word." She clucks her tongue disapprovingly, even as Malachite dismisses that argument with an angry gesture.

"You know perfectly well what I mean."

"Hrmm. I do indeed, and I'll answer you truthfully." Her eyes widen as her face takes on almost a serious, almost saintly expression. "There are signs that planar travel might get a bit difficult in the near future. I wouldn't want Agar to get stranded in this backwater prime and miss his own wedding. Since it's my responsibility to make sure that doesn't happen, I think he could use a restful vacation at home, free from the burdens of travel."

"She's got to be lying," thinks Nolin, "but if she is I can't prove it."

"Well, she IS a pit fiend," thinks Mara. "I imagine she's better at it than you are."

"Why is it your responsibility?"

"I'm a family friend. Think of me as the matchmaker. It's my honor to do this favor."

Tao's face twists in thought. "I'll bet. What's going to affect planar travel?" The elderly halfling shrugs. "Well, what sort of planar travel might be affected?"

"I really couldn't say. Certainly, plane shift..."

"What about gate?"

The halfling sneers in disbelief. "You can gate?"

"I can indeed." Tao smiles evilly, thinking of her goddess' solar. "Want to see?" But the halfling woman is looking thoughtful.

"Well. If you can gate..." She taps her chin with one blunt finger. "If you can gate, you should be fine, and I'm not needed for this." The edge of her mouth twitches as she reaches a decision. "Interesting. If I allow you to do this, do you promise to deliver Agar at least three days before the ceremony?"

Nolin visibly relaxes. "Of course. As I said, we're in the middle of something right now. We should be done by then. No problem." Tao nods in agreement.

"Well, certainly Agar's family will be eager to see him." The pit fiend smiles sweetly. "They're in good health now for an elderly couple, but who knows how long that will last for? The world is such an unpredictable place. Let's hope you don't do anything foolish like trying to break your promise a second time." She winks. "Can you imagine the scandal and the fuss in his family's village? But somehow, I don't think you will."

Agar stiffens, and both paladins' controlled fury ripples the air. "Are you quite done?" asks Malachite coldly. Narrow edges of sunlight shine out of the edges of his sword's scabbard, where the sheathed Karthos is blazing in response to his owner's mood. The pit fiend looks up at the Hunter of the Dead, eyes knowing and old.

"I certainly am. You are bound by your promise. I'm sure you won't break it." The elderly female halfling turns, and then glances back at the group. "See you around," she says warmly, and wanders away into the darkness of a tunnel. Her footsteps quickly fade.

Agar tugs on Nolin's cloak. "You hear her? I don't want anything to happen to my parents!" He paces back and forth like a caged animal, looking glum. "I think I'm trapped. What do I do?"

"Try not to worry," says Mara, staring after the pit fiend, her voice distant. "We'll sort this out."

"What's going to affect planar travel?"

Velendo grunts as he sits down on a rock. "Probably this same damn disaster that the omens are foretelling, whatever the heck that is. The one somehow we're responsible for." Tao feels a twinge in her shoulder, a reminder of the soreness she felt five days ago when she first dreamed of falling.

Next to Stone Bear, the shadowy form of a spirit guide grins in the darkness. "Soon," Elder whispers in a promise to the worried shaman. "Soon."